How to Grow in Discernment: A Simple Guide to Spiritual Sensitivity

What Discernment Is—and Isn’t

We’ve all met someone who thinks discernment means pointing out everyone’s issues—or walking into a room and declaring, “I sense something…” (insert dramatic pause). But here’s the truth: real discernment doesn’t make us strange—it makes us wise, humble, and loving.

Discernment isn’t about suspicion or drama. It’s about intimacy with the Holy Spirit.

At Melkbos Fellowship, we’re learning that spiritual maturity means learning to see things clearly—both the good and the bad—and responding like Jesus would. Whether you’re discerning an atmosphere, someone’s struggle, or your own spiritual blind spots, this is a gift God wants to grow in you.

What Discernment Is—and Isn’t

Discernment is not a feeling or a “gut instinct.”
It’s not intuition.
It’s not guesswork.
It’s not even always right on the first try.

Discernment is:

• A spiritual gift (1 Corinthians 12:10)
• A result of maturity (Hebrews 5:14)
• A partnership with the Holy Spirit (John 16:13)

So how do we actually grow in it?

1. Start with Humility

Discernment grows best in humble soil. Be open to being wrong. Say, “Lord, teach me,” more than, “I know what this is.”

“God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” – James 4:6

2. Ask the Holy Spirit First

When something doesn’t feel right, pause and ask:

“Holy Spirit, what’s going on here?”
“Is this You? Or something else?”
“How should I respond?”

Discernment is less about identifying the problem and more about tuning in to God’s perspective on it.

3. Check it Against Scripture

God will never give you a sense that contradicts His Word.

If you’re feeling stirred to speak, respond, or act—ask, “Does this align with Scripture?”
If not, it's not from the Spirit of Truth.

“All Scripture is God-breathed and useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness.” – 2 Timothy 3:16

4. Submit It to Leadership

Even when you're confident in what you're sensing, it's important to test it in the community. Share it with a mature believer or leader you trust.

Discernment submitted to godly authority becomes sharp and trustworthy. Discernment used independently can quickly become dangerous.

“In the multitude of counselors there is safety.” – Proverbs 11:14

5. Reflect and Practice Daily

The more you practice discernment, the stronger it becomes. Take time to review your day with the Holy Spirit:

• What did I sense today?
• Was it from God?
• How did I respond?
• What would I do differently next time?

Journal your experiences and pray into them. This is spiritual training (Hebrews 5:14)!

6. Stay in Love

Discernment is never a license to gossip, critique, or act superior. It should always flow from love, humility, and the desire to build up others.

“If I have prophetic powers... but have not love, I am nothing.” – 1 Corinthians 13:2

Action Step for This Month:

Take one moment each day this week to stop and ask the Holy Spirit what He sees in a situation you’re facing. Write it down. Pray into it. And submit what you sense to a trusted believer.

Let’s grow in discernment together—without getting weird. Just Spirit-led, Jesus-focused maturity.